In The News

In The News

Why is it that the term “pussycat” is so cute, while the term “cat pussy” is just plain nasty?

And now the headlines:

BUSH DUCKS SHOES ON FAREWELL TRIP TO WAR ZONES
This headline is false. The shoes actually avoided contact because they didn’t want to get shit on themselves.

WHAT OBAMA CAN LEARN FROM BUSH
Simple. Do the opposite.

IN JESUS’ TOWN, CHRISTMAS LOOKING CHEERFUL AGAIN
When did we start calling Vatican City Jesus’ town? Oh, Bethlehem? Right. My bad.

STEELERS RALLY TO BEAT RAVENS 13-9, WIN AFC NORTH
Would you look at that, they spelled stealers wrong! Sorry, the wound is not sufficiently scabbed over yet.

NY GIANTS NEED A SACK — TO COVER FAN’S RACY OUTFIT
Lions, Bengals, Seahawks, Rams and Chiefs fans need sacks – to cover teams’ shitty seasons and/or their faces.

TOM CRUISE SAYS HE WAS “ARROGANT” IN TV INTERVIEW
He also pointed out that the sky is blue, and that Grease is the word.

MAN ACCUSED OF STEALING FRIDGE WITH URINE SAMPLES
The authorities are pissed.

LUSTFUL MADONNA OFFENDS GOD, SAYS CLERGYMAN
Where have you been, Padre? She’s been justifying her love for getting horizontal (among other orientations) for 25 years and you’re just noticing?




About the Author

I am patiently waiting for the Mothership to take me back to my planet.