I’ll start with the subject lines from three spam/ED/porn emails I had waiting for me in my inbox this morning:
Give her multiple peaks
OK, first things first, I give them a lot of credit for spelling peaks correctly. That shows attention to detail.
Your manhood’s loyal to you again
Umm, I know what you’re trying to say here but I am not sure that’s the way I’d put it. It’s always loyal to me. I never leave home without it and vice versa. We’re inseparable barring some terrible accident or angry woman bearing sharp utensils. And my favorite of the three:
Better thrusting with beloved one
This is pure gold. Can’t you just see the poor, Chinese worker rifling through some dusty, ragged Chinese-to-English translation guide in an effort to sell knock-off Viagra?
On a related note, why do they call them privates if our entire goal is to share them as often as possible?
Boobs. Still a fan.
OK, next topic… balding. It’s going to happen to me. It’s already started. So, I am doing my due diligence for future options. In doing so I found these results reported:
One study in healthy males aged 18–50 years with androgenic alopecia (male pattern baldness) found that compared to a baseline of 103 to 106 hairs/cm2, those who applied a 5% solution of minoxidil for 32 weeks increased their non-vellus hair counts by an average of 39 hairs/cm2, in contrast to 5 hairs/cm2 in subjects who received a placebo.
Are you reading that the same way I do? In contrast to subjects who received a placebo? What the Hell is that? Our product is better than nothing. Wow, all hail the triumphs of science.
Alright, that’s enough for today. Peace out.